Tuesday, 15 August 2017

How to be Strong and Never Give Up



We are living in our current reality where discouragement is the order of the day.  

Now and again I see myself and whatever is left of the world as warriors in a battle for freedom, fighting for our rights to live.

We will fail, unless we stay together, work together, and fight together. Why? 

Please read on...

Wednesday, 9 August 2017

Waking Up Early is as Simple as A B C with no App!


It was a cold morning the weather was cool because it rained cat and dog the previous night. 

And now, you’re feeling warm and comfortable under your mattress, hoping to remain there as comfortable as you can and then, suddenly,

the “Grrin-Grron Grrin” sound “from nowhere” (it actually came from somewhere you know very well, for a fact!). 

Friday, 9 June 2017

How to Master Your Time

Everyone in the working arena are consciously and unconsciously singing a song with the LETTER headed title: 

NO TIME! NO TIME!! NO TIME!!! 

And so, we resort to the fastest way of doing things. 

Will this new norm favor is?
Or could there be any consequences to it?

Friday, 28 April 2017

7 Tips to Build a Strong Work Ethic (Part 2)

To read part 1; Click Here.


If it is a must to achieve your goal and purpose in life, then it is equally a must to apply yourself in or exert yourself vigorously to attain it. 

There must be action on your part. 

There is no shortcut to success and there is no half success. 

As we continue to explode with knowledge, our heads becomes filled with distractions (lot of distractions) causing discouragement and making us to think we have to do so much to succeed. 

In reality, all that you need is a plan, time and a strong work ethic that will govern your action to bring your desired result. 

We must accept the challenge of staying focused in this world of increasing distraction and see how far we can push our self-discipline.

Do not fear going forward slowly; fear only to stand.

Below are seven suggestions to get you working productively.


1.    Start taking action.

Wishing for something to be done never make it done. Start taking action from today. To achieve your purpose, you need to start taking action and Start DOING. 

Make it your goal and determine never to be idle… It is wonderful how much may be done if we are always doing. 

Taking action produces faster results than thinking about taking action. 

Many of the problems people discuss endlessly could be resolved with less than 10 minutes of direct action.
 
Repeatedly driving yourself to get into action creates flow (and feels good). 



2.    Create a good purpose.


Destiny is not the part giving to us, but the part we choose for ourselves.

Set your purpose straight and then act in alignment with that purpose. Don’t just spin in circles doing pointless busy-work that won’t lead you to your desired results. 

When you work, work towards an end result as you desired. Plan each day in advance, ideally at the end of the previous workday. 

During this time, check back in with your mission to see if you are on track. 

Plan your days in alignment with your long-term priorities; and as you consider possible actions to take, ask yourself which ones will matter in a year, two or three years later. 

Load the bulk of your time with actions that you expect will produce long-term improvement.


3.    Replace bad habits with good ones.

If a habit will do you little or no good to maintain for the next three years, then why are you keeping it in your life? 

Note: Don’t try to break bad habits. You can’t replace a habit with a void or an empty area or space. 

Instead, select better substitutes that you can condition in place of the old ones. 

Don't just say: "I want to quit this lateness attitude" alone. Promise yourself, and start to reward yourself anytime you move early to a meeting (don't waver - you know it's good for you).


4.    ...But earn your rewards first.

Don’t waste time. It is precious. Work first, and then play. 

Play is sweetest when it’s earned. So is sleep. 

Earn your sleep each night by working hard on your goals during the day. Go to bed with the sweet smile of accomplishment still on your lips.

Take your rewards. Enjoy your life... 

The idle man does not know what it is to enjoy rest, for he has not earned it... 

Playing before you’ve earned your play-time, robs the play of much of its pleasure. If you love to play, then you’d better love to work.

And When you are resting or playing, leave your work at work and don’t destroy the restorative value of non-work activities by bleeding half-work into them.


5.     Be vigilant in choosing your associates.

A bad association, spoil a useful habit. 

So the saying goes: “Show me your friend and I will tell you who you are”. 

Choose your peers with care, for they could affect your life either positively or negatively. 

A lazy person, whatever the talents with which he set out, will have condemned himself to second-hand thoughts and to second-rate friends. 

Maintain high standards for your social circle. Keep yourself at arm’s length from the lazy, the unproductive, and the negative minded. 

A weak social circle is a psychological prison.

Befriend and associate with the hard-working, ambitious, successful people, and you’ll soon count yourself among them.



6.    Action beget result and success.

Wishing for more from life is wonderful, but don’t use the Law of Attraction as an excuse for laziness. 

You are free to keep wishing for more from life. But recognize that your own hard, disciplined work efforts are often integral to the manifesting process... 

The Law of Attraction works best when every fiber of your being is congruent with your desires.

How congruent are you when you’re sitting on your couch watching TV while intending more abundance to come into your life?

The hidden truth your enemy will hardly tell is: “you look a lot more congruent; when you work your ass off during the day taking actions that you believe will help you achieve your goal faster”. 

So, if you fritter away most of your days by sleeping in late, if you spend hours doing low value tasks that don’t need to be done (and calling it research), and if you end most of your days with that sinking feeling that you could have done a lot better, that isn’t manifesting.

That’s just being lazy.

If you want to become better at manifesting your desires, then step into the difficulties of making tough decisions. 

Yes. Accept the challenge of staying focused in a world of increasing distraction and see how far you can push your self-discipline. 

Explore fresh ways to create and share value with the world. 

Motivate yourself to take action. Because, if you don’t, nothing (I repeat) nothing will take place

But if you think you’re good at manifesting, then manifest some focus, drive, and self-discipline, and you’ll find that your ability to experience what you desire increases significantly. 

No more sitting on the sidelines hoping for changes that never arrive.

Manifest strength and motivation. Then use them to your benefit. That’s what you really desire. 

Don’t waste your strength and your time on unworthy short-cut intentions that would only weaken you if you actually received them.



7.    Maintain Your Focus and Persistence

All the suggestions above could lose their value if you have no focus and persistence. 

You see, people with a good work ethic have the ability to stay focused on tasks for as long as necessary to get them done; and building persistence will allow you to basically train yourself to work for longer periods of time while also working harder. 

But it is also important though, to balance persistence with adequate rest to reduce the risk of burnout. 

So focus is equally as important as persistence when it comes to work ethic. 

Focusing will allow you to finish tasks more efficiently while avoiding distractions. 

But if you always find it difficult to do great things, then, do the little you know in great ways.

What next?

Now that you have learnt what it takes to be a strong ethical work man, can you allow yourself to become a hard worker? 

When someone asks if you have a strong work ethic, can you see yourself saying YES without hesitation? 

If so, keep doing it.

For now, go do something truly challenging for the next few hours.

And when you're done, come back and tell me how you're felling in the comment box below.


Related:



SUCCESS AND YOU 

5 TIPS TO GET AND KEEP A JOB 

10 REASONS TO CONTROL YOUR TONGUE 

HOW TO MAKE A HAPPY CAREER'S CHOICE IN YOUR 20s 

DOES COMPETITION RUNS YOUR LIFE? 


Wednesday, 26 April 2017

7 Tips to Build a Strong Work Ethic




Everybody around the globe is working... 

But very few of us, gets and meet their desired results and goals. Why? 

Most people are missing the special ingredients needed to achieve their desired result in life.

And what is that ingredients? 

Please read on.. I will explain everything to you...


First, I want you to remember this simple fact: “Whether you work or not, the time will still pass anyway. So use your time wisely”... 

Below are seven suggestions to get you working productively, and If you’ve been stuck in a lazy rut lately, this is specially for you.




1.    Start your day with VIGOR.

When you wake up, get up. Get moving and get going. Continue it, and it will become a habit.

If you aren’t doing this naturally already, then make use and respect the utility of a quality alarm clock. 

When your alarm sounds, pop out of bed and stand up first; then you can switch it off with your feet firmly on the ground.

If you are having difficulties and can’t wake up strongly in the morning, then fix your disgusting diet that’s draining you of energy and motivation instead of fuelling you powerfully (a purpose which I believe food is meant for).

Start each day with a strong morning, and the rest of the day will tend to follow. 

Move with power and purpose during that first hour.. and Own your mornings. 

Maintain this attitude of mastery over your time as far into each day as possible, and watch the outcome.

The results will wow you!


2.    Exercise! Exercise!! Exercise!!!
 
Do you know that Exercising strongly (especially in the morning) can set your full body on fire? 

The brain loves it too. 

A strong work ethic begins with a disciplined morning routine. Don’t be caught lying on your back half-conscious, dragging yourself out of bed in a lazy half-start to your day.

If the President of the USA can find time in his exceedingly busy schedule to exercise for 45 minutes each morning, you surely have time.

Your body is meant to move. Your brain especially suffers from a lack of exercise, leading to imbalances in hormones and neurotransmitters. 

Physical exercise is one of the brain’s best rejuvenators. 

Don’t allow your mind to be dragged down by a sluggish body (you are too precious for that). 

If you have difficulty focusing your mind, start by focusing on your body.

When you exercise, make it challenging. Yes; don’t just do the same thing over and over alone. 

Mix it up. Push yourself. Make it intense. Give yourself not only a physical challenge but also a mental one. 

Embrace the terrific feeling of accomplishing something difficult each day, ideally in the morning. Kick off your day with a physical victory.

Know this: 
Exercise isn’t just training for your body. It’s training for your mind — and especially for your self-discipline.


3.    Accept that results require hard work.

There is no fatigue so wearisome as that which comes from lack of work. 

Remind yourself of the simple causality chain from decision to action to results. That middle phase is where most of the work is.

Keep it in mind, if you have no willingness to ever work your ass off, 

if you have such resistance to the very notion of pushing yourself, 

if you have an overdeveloped sense of entitlement that all the goodness of life should flow to you with effortless ease, that’s great. 

Then, you can read this article purely for entertainment purposes.

But — if you’re a more pragmatic realist, and you can recognize that many goals are too big and challenging just to attract and manifest out of thin air, 

if you can see that the whole point of tackling bigger goals is to develop yourself into a person of bold action, 

if you can accept that avoiding action altogether is a recipe for stagnation, and especially if you’re tired of not getting the results you actually want and having to settle for less, 

then perhaps you can make this important leap and accept that some of your goals will require you to achieve them with hard work, lots of disciplined, and a focused action.


4.    Self-discipline vs. Laziness.

How does self-discipline vs. laziness feels to you?

Notice that during those times when you actually do discipline yourself to take action, it often feels fantastic once you get past the first 15 minutes or so (right?).

Remember what it feels like to push yourself beyond your comfort zone and get into the flow of action.

Tell me: 

How did you feel when you put in that extra hour? 

To go to work when you could have justified taking an extra day off? 

To put in the time to complete that optional creative project? 

Sure.. it involved some sacrifice (definitely). 

But what did you give up? Extra TV time, a little web surfing, and some time lying flat on your back perhaps. 

And what did you gain for your efforts? It wasn’t just the end result (remember). You grew stronger. 

Seriously my friend, inaction can be unforgiving.
 
Because, it kills your results, drains your energy, waste your time, and drains you of hope.  

As for self-discipline; it pays you back with all of these results and more, including significantly greater happiness, fulfilment, and self-esteem. 

You can’t afford to miss these.


5.    So.. Embrace responsibility.

Whatever you do, recognize that no one is coming to rescue you. You are on your own. 

No one will force you into the flow of action. You must do this for yourself.

The lazy avoidance of responsibility isn’t for you. 

You don’t want stagnation. You want growth, and this requires action, movement, and changes that will come from you. 

This will requires you to make some decisions and get going.

Do not confuse laziness with ease. 

In the long run, laziness yields only pointless difficulties and painful regret — and rightly so since you’ll always know you could have avoided those difficulties if you’d really stepped up; and don’t put this burden of action on anyone else. 

It rests squarely on your shoulders, if for no other reason than because you’re the one who ultimately has to shoulder the results.


6.    Do a real challenging work before lunch.

Idleness warps the mind. That’s why nobody can think straight who does not work. 

So Kick off each workday with a mental challenge. Don’t start with something light and cushy. 

Dive right into a challenging task that some part of you would rather avoid. Train yourself to embrace what’s difficult instead of pushing it away.

You know, when you avoid difficult tasks by pushing them later into your day, soon you’ll justify bumping them into the next day… 

and then the next one… and then into next week… and then you’ll realize this little postponement has somehow ballooned into months of procrastination. 

So, to avoid a difficult task this moment is to condition the habit of postponing difficulties indefinitely. This is no way to claim the benefits that come from doing difficult work.

Avoid the habit of resisting difficult tasks. 

Embrace them as your daily resistance training, and you’ll see benefits that come from doing difficult work.


7.    Know Your Values.

Pay special attention to your values—The reasons why you do the work that you do, and the reason you get up from bed every morning. 

Take some time to carefully consider your values and then write them down. 

You might value creativity, solving problems, helping others or any number of things (but your values will always be unique to you). 

Thinking about why you want to work harder can be the only boost in motivation you need.

In addition, you'll be much happier with your life if you live by your personal values; each and every day. 

Most people think that success is about just making money or reaching your goals. It's beyond that; Success is about doing what's important to you, and maintaining the process while you are happy doing it. 


Your work ethic will naturally improve as a result, if you never give up.


What next?


You have learned what it takes to be a strong ethical work man. 

It is ultimately a matter of becoming an action-oriented person. 

Steer your self-development path in this direction. 

Decide that you’ll grow into a person with a strong, powerful work ethic. 

The doing part will flow more easily if you can embrace the “being” part of it.


(Continue and Read the second part of this article — HERE)

Related:

DOES COMPETITION RUNS YOUR LIFE?

HOW TO MAKE A HAPPY CAREER'S CHOICE IN YOUR 20s

HOW TO RESPECT MONEY AND LIVE LONGER 

5 TIPS TO GET AND KEEP A JOB 

Saturday, 15 April 2017

Never Give Up Now Until You Read this!!



Most people today, have the habit of disqualifying themselves. They find it too easy, or fond of blaming themselves before anyone else does. 

Especially when they screw up, (like) eat bad foods, or say a bad word. 

And they forget to realize that mistakes are proofs to others (to everyone) that you are trying...

Some even struggles with emotional thoughts like "I'm never good for anything". How wrong they are! 

Everyone has his own place in this world of humanity, and you are (very) important to the world.

So when you screw up, skip a workout, eat bad foods, or say a bad word, it doesn't make you a bad person. It only makes you human. 

We have all commit wrong at times due to fear, pride, hunger, inexperienced, or peer pressure. 

But we are still here, happy and enjoying our time, because we didn't let our mistakes get the best of us.

Did you noticed the plate at the onset of this article? Yes, look at it again... The plate is broken. 

Now, when plates are broken, they are being sent to the waste bin, for they have become USELESS.. But,, in the hand of the one who made it, the plate can be reuse again. 

In contrast, WE HUMANS are never useless, we are more important, unique, and wonderfully made, than a broken plate...

NOT EVEN OUR PAST OR PRESENT MISTAKES CAN RENDER US USELESS. WE GROW EVERY DAY, AND LEARN EVERYDAY. 

WE ARE CREATURES OF THOUGHTS, THAT LEARN CONSTANTLY FROM WHAT WE SEE AND DO EVERYDAY, WITH THE ABILITY TO BECOME BETTER THAN WHO WE FORMALLY WERE.

The world will not remain the same without you.

Some have the habit of disqualifying themselves when they have made the mistake with thoughts like "I'm never good for anything". Who told you that??

Today, I want you to know that EVEN IF A SINGLE CRACK CAN RENDER A PLATE USELESS, WE ARE NEVER USELESS FOR A MISTAKE WE HAVE MADE,    because, 

WE L-E-A-R-N EVERYDAY FROM OUR MISTAKES, AND WE BECOME BETTER THAN YESTERDAY.

People change.

Unlike the broken plate, we have the ability, to amend, fix, and correct our mistakes. 

The only question here now is: WOULD WE MAKE THE EFFORT, TO RISE ABOVE OUR ERRORS?

We have two options:

Remain like the broken plate, or

Rise up and fix your error.

So, do not disqualify yourself, instead, learn to turn a setback into a comeback. 

If no one has ever told you before, I will tell you today and now that mistakes are proofs to others that you are trying. 

So keep the fire burning and do not be afraid to make mistakes. For, if you never try, you will never have nor make it.


WHEN BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO US

Never give up. Be strong, and be good to others, while you remain grateful for the breath you still possess.

The pressure to move out of your cause can be very strong at times, and you feel you are losing yourself and losing your image. 

But remember this: 

The time could be 12am or whatever. But just because we are at a darkest moment doesn't mean morning would never come.

Challenges come, and they go.

Problems come and they go.

And they will always go.

So never allow your worse moments to take the best of you.


BE STRONG, NEVER GIVE UP

Sometimes it may seem so difficult to endure... with pressures that may seem so unbearable. 

But know this that you are not alone. 

Others, in different parts of the world are also experiencing or combating with same type of challenges as yours or other forms of issues worse than you do. 

Some suffer with both. This should comfort you.

Whatever challenging situation you are right now, there is always a way out and a solution that could benefit others and yourself.


TAKE BABY STEPS.. BUT DON'T STOP

A city is not built in a day. Make it your goal to improve yourself and your life every moment of your life— day by day. 

Do something every day that could add up value to your life at the end of the month. 

In doing so, be patient and persistent while the results are yet to display. 

Remember: 

A river cuts through rocks, not because of its power, but because of its persistent.

You may have heard before that tough times never last, but tough people do... But hearing and doing, are two different things.

Whether you work to better your own life, or disregard yourself and your future to live a wayward life, the TIME will still pass away, anyway; and who's to be blamed? 

Just you yourself.


GOOD FRIENDS ARE ESSENTIAL TO YOUR LIFE

Make good friends with those not just within your age-mates alone, but with those that are below and above your age, who are wise and sensible. 

To make friends, you should make people like you first. 

The secret to making people like you is showing how much you like them!

Be open to a friendship that could better your life. 

At the same time, be watchful to avoid fair-weather friends, who come around, only for what they could get from you, and disappear when the rain comes—Living you to deal with your problems alone.

Take care of yourself, and if you have found the good one, please be your friend's keeper

Do not let them down. Don't use their own weakness against them or take advantage of them when they are in need... 

It's true that friendship should affect us for good, but don't expect too much or concentrate on only what you would get out of the relationship.

Relationship goes in pari-passu or side by side; at the same rate or on an equal footing.. 

Both parties benefits from it, while they concentrates on helping each other to grow.

Yes... People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care about them.


Related:

HOW TO COPE WITH DEPRESSION (d.p) 

LONELY... BUT HAPPY. HOW? 

DOES COMPETITION RUNS YOUR LIFE? 

HOW TO RESPECT MONEY AND LIVE LONGER 

HOW TO MAKE A HAPPY CAREER'S CHOICE IN YOUR 20s 

5 TIPS TO GET AND KEEP A JOB 

 

Friday, 31 March 2017

How to Cope with Depression (d.p)


Do you know anyone who is depressed?

(Are you depressed right now?)

When  you are depressed, you will not have the motivation to do 
anything, not even the things you usually love to do. 

And then, sleep will be your friend...


If it remains for a long time, you will begin to feel unlovable, worthless, and a burden to others. 

In an attempt to stop feeling this way, some resort to the thought of suicide. But deep inside you (between me and you), you know you don't really want to die. 

All you wanted is for that feeling to go away.


I've been t
here before. And after my experience with depression, I knew it was not easy to cope with.

I'm fully aware now that I was not alone in this. I knew that there are other friends out there that will benefit greatly from the experience of how I became the happiest man I am today. 

I'm yet to meet that super man that have never felt down or experience depression once in his life. 

If one of them is reading this right now, great! Then the word  "depression" might look strange to you a bit.

Let me quickly show you how it feels. 

You see, being depressed is like being stuck in a deep, dark hole with no way out, and you feel like you are losing your mind, losing who you are.


The truth is:


The exact causes of depression remain unclear. 

According to experts, depression often runs in families, suggesting that genetics can play a role. 

While a little stress can be healthy, excessive stress can be physically and psychological harmful, sometimes to the point of plunging a susceptible, or biologically vulnerable teen into depression.

 

My problem then was..

Unrealistically high expectations from my friends (especially moved ones)
 disappointments, and unfulfilled promises; often thinking  that  things will  never  change and  everything  is just hopeless... 

Yours may be different, but note this:

Those thoughts did not help me, nor give me the needed strength or energy to cope. 

Instead they were only weighing me down with confusion. 

When there is confusion, your vision becomes blunt, thinking, stagnant... And mind filled with negativity.

Negative thoughts can affect  the  way  we feel  and  behave;  they maintain depressio
n  by  affecting  perception and exacerbating  symptoms.


Yours may be different. 

Whatever the cause is, note this

Taking control of your emotions is not just the solution alone, It is a process. Be persistent in your resolve. 

Follow a pattern,,, one that is affecting your day  to day  functioning in a positive way. 


I lived through it, So can you.

Yes. Presently bouncing with life and energy, with so many friends around that keeps me busy, warm and happy! 

I didn't became like this automagically (over-night), though there were times when I which the feelings could just disappear instantly,  to which I know was impossible.


Yes. People I trusted actually let me down, but I succeeded only because I changed my view and life style. 

In my combat with depression, I never make alcohol my friend. Maybe that's what contributed to my speed recovery from depression. 

Don't withdraw from life. Don't drink too much alcohol, and you will feel not just ok, but better. 

I invested time with constant effort to turn my life around and I succeeded. So can you.

 
It's a process; not just a solution

It needs time with concentratio
n and focus to become the type of person you want to be. 

If you are okay with your current situation now, no problem. But if you suffer from depression, take reasonable measure to care for your mental and physical health everyday. 

For instance, to be physically healthy, eat wholesome meal (foods that supply your  body with the needed nutrients, strength, and vitality).

Care for yourself and your mental health. To do this, get sufficient sleep, and exercise regularly (if your circumstances allowed). 

You know, exercise releases chemicals that can lift your spirit and increase your energy.

Meet a MENTAL-HEALTH PROFESSIONAL for needed medication and counseling.


Practice Giving

Don't be selfish. I've noticed that people who love to give (for the good of it, and not because they are
  seeking blessings) are happy and lively. 

People are generally drown to givers than receivers. They are hardly left alone.

Among the few things we can give to others are:

  •     Our Money.
  •     Our Time.
  •     Our Energy.
  •     Our Food.
  •     Our Love.
  •     Our Attention.
  •     Our Chances.
  •     Our Home.


(The list goes on and on).

So which one can you give?


Be Prepared

To wand off depressive mood, and start living the real you, you need to try your best to be observant and recognize triggers and early signs of 

depressive mood.

Write down the names of trusted friends you can meet or call during emergency outbreak. 

Confiding in someone you trust, can help to lift your spirit and increase your energy during depressive mood. 

At the same time, a supportive network of close family members and friends may also help you to cope more effectively with your depression and possibly reducing symptoms.


***
For more info, check this tips from everydayhealth on other ways to cope with depression.


 

Related:


NEVER GIVE UP NOW UNTILL YOU READ THIS

LONELY... BUT HAPPY. HOW? 

DOES COMPETITION RUNS YOUR LIFE? 

HOW TO RESPECT MONEY AND LIVE LONGER 

HOW TO MAKE A HAPPY CAREER'S CHOICE IN YOUR 20s 

5 TIPS TO GET AND KEEP A JOB

Sunday, 19 March 2017

The Race You Can Never Win


Running away from your problems, is a race you'll never win.

One of the things we do most frequently in life is — make decisions. 

Each moment of our life we make decisions about what  we need or want to do. But why is decision-making so important?

Growing up, I used to think being depressed or having anxiety problems was just silly and weak. 

On the other hand, I felt empowered when I was angry and burying my head on a video game was my safe haven from troubles and problems.

Looking back now, I think I really hurt some people as well as my self because I didn't know how to deal with emotions properly while they were actually happening.

And I never give a thought on how my decisions was actually affecting others.

You see, making correct decisions is critical because of their  consequences

One decision could change the course of our life; some might even change, the course of eternity.  

Usually at a younger or ideological age we are inclined to see decisions as black or white, good or bad, right or wrong. 

With wisdom, hindsight  and, maybe age, we realize that some decisions are not black or white; there are all kinds of grey in between.  

This is what creates a dilemma

At times you have  to choose between the better of two good things and the better of  two evils. This makes decision-making difficult. 

We  avoid having  to choose between two bad  things because it goes against our belief system. 

One result can  have both good and  bad consequences, or the better option  may carry risks.  

Most of the time we are  free to make our own decisions. At times there will be issues in life where we'll be forced into making a decision

The unavoidable truth is, If we do not make some decisions, others will make them  for us


Our belief system will influence how and what decisions we'll make. A strong belief system  will give us the confidence required to be firm and precise in our decision-making. 

But some do run away!!


What do you do when faced with a big decision to which you don’t know the answer?

Do you opt for the middle road that marginally meets everyone’s needs? 

Do you sacrifice your needs for others? 

Do you randomly pick an option, and simply hope for the best? 

Do you pick what seems to be the most logical, even though you are not 100% sure? 

Do you put off the decision making process and hope everything will sort itself out eventually?


Running away from  our decisions is not  decision-making. It is decision avoidance and this generally makes the matter worse.  
The ‘important’ becomes ‘urgent’. The ‘urgent’  becomes ‘critical’.

I’ve learned from life's lessons that it’s only when we stop running and embrace the truth that we really begin to resolve our problems. That's when we begin to live.

We all want resolutions as simple as purchasing a plane ticket, updating our “Current City” on Facebook and moving on with our lives, but we forget that our emotional ties run deeper than that. 

We forget that we can never fly far enough away from ourselves to escape what it is that lies unresolved within us.

Our unresolved emotional clutter seeps into every facet of our lives, stealthily enough to remain eternally undetected. 

It’s the hesitation deep in our gut that balks when new opportunity arises. It’s the sense of self-doubt that creeps in when you’re challenged. 

It’s the same old pain of trying to write a new chapter without finishing the old one – you do not have a frame of reference to carry on forward. 

You’re trying to grab at something new with full hands and yet you cannot figure out why you keep dropping it.

When you constantly run from the past, it wears away the present with a vengeance.

When you run away from all of your problems, you eventually run from yourself. 

You forget the person you could be if you stayed in one place, worked through your downfalls, accepted your shortcomings and then overcame them. 

You forget that there’s a version of you who is reliable and passionate and strong. You lose the sense of pride you used to have from persevering. 

Running away from your problems is a race you'll never win. 

Instead of solving it, it increases the distance from the solution.



WHAT YOU CAN DO

Stop pretending like you don’t care and start taking responsibility for your emotions.

I use to either pretend things are not a big deal or pretend they aren’t happening and yet the issues will still be there no matter how tired, busy or seemingly indispensable I make myself.  

And these issues usually crop up to me again and again, interfering with my regular level of functioning until I finally face them. 

I'm not going through that again. Never. 

I've realized that it’s only when we stop running and embrace the truth that we really begin to resolve our problems—the point where we begin to live. 


YOU CAN'T BE STRONG FOR NOTHING

Strong people don’t ignore every negative experience and let it eat at them from the inside out.

Strong people don’t build walls. 

They don’t deny their feelings. They embrace them and then tackle their problems head on.

We’ve all got a lot to learn and if we don’t learn to embrace how we feel, we may stop feeling all together.

Do not run away from your problems. Every problem has a solution.


TAKE A MOMENT TO ANALYSE THE PROBLEM

When everything has started to go wrong in twos and threes and you feel incapable of dealing with it all, take a break from all your other activities. 


No man will prefer to have a good time with his friends when he is aware that his house is on fire. 

Take time off to think things through. A time to dwell on the issues at hand. Why is this important?

If you choose to pretend as if nothing is happening, the issues will still be there no matter how tired, busy or seemingly indispensable you make yourself.  

And these issues will soon crop up to be met with again and again, interfering with your regular level of functioning until you finally face them. 

You don't want that... Do you?

You can decide to deal with the problem by yourself or seek the help of a trusted friend.

If you decide to deal with the problem by yourself, like what I do most of the time, you should set aside a particular time like a day or two from your busy schedule, go to a friend's house, rent a hotel's room, or live in your van for a weekend. 

Avoid distraction by switching off your phone and anything to just get away and do nothing but think.
 

Be honest with yourself. 

Think things through and look at your life from a different angle. Look at your own life from the perspective of a third person. Look at your life from a distance.


WHAT I DO AT TIMES:

Sometimes I try to occasionally view my life like a movie or as if am reading a novel. 

While it may seem a little odd at first, the more I aim to watch my life from the viewpoint of someone neutral, the more I piece together patterns and even laugh a little at the self that keeps trying in spite of the odds stacked against repeating negative patterns.

If you can, try it. 

Just try to be neutral for a moment by stepping out of yourself. 

You know, putting yourself into the position of a character can help you to perceive the main themes that continue to be met by the character and also help you to fix the issue at hand in a clear perspective. 

Yes it works. 

Standing outside of yourself and your current situation may be the only way you can be objective or realistic about any issues you are facing.

If you already have too much on your table give yourself more space by dropping a few obligations. 


If you're over-committed, it's likely you're also under-performing in a number of ways and that hurts both you, your friends and those depending on you.



BE STRONG AND NEVER GIVE UP

We may have made some mistakes at one point in our lives, but acknowledging that we are imperfect humans who make mistakes at times will give us the needed strength to rise above our errors. 

To be strong, we have to continue  seeking ways to either learn to live with them or to build up more of our strengths to ensure that the weaknesses do not lead us instead.


NOW WHAT:

Life is not easy. Sometimes the only option available when there are issues or troubles, may seem to be for us to hide ourselves from the cruel reality of our past. 

But... Don't be afraid to fall. 

Don't be discourage if you are facing some challenges now. 

Whatever happens, remember that: The one who fell down and get up is so much stronger than the one who never fall. 

Your past can Only hurt you If you let it. 

Making mistakes Does not downgrade You. 

Instead, it is what You do after realizing you Have made a mistake that determines if people will learn from your example, or from your lesson.

Saturday, 25 February 2017

Success, and You!!










How do you measure success?

If I should walk up to you and ask you: 

Hey! Hello,, How do you measure success?

What would be your reply?

Would you give me a straight answer or you would pause and think for a number of minutes?

Well, however your actions may be, you may have seen someone successful in your area and also read or listened to the story of famous successful figures in the news or on the internet. 

At times we can't help but wish to be like them. 

Yet so many times we fall into the trap of short-sightedness about success due to our immediate situation. 

As a result, we make decisions base on our immediate need (may that never happen to you). 

 Instead of thinking about what others think, why not try to  think about what you know is right?

           I pose this question to a young man called Felix (name changed). And his reply was:

“Success to me is when a page on Facebook displays my name and is captioned as public figure” (And he was equally right).

Children wish in their heart: “if I can get much money from dad I will buy that game console”.. 

As adult you probably have some plans in your heart every day like : “if I can work much longer hours, I could build that dream house, a nice car and a happy family".

We can go on and on specifying many different examples, but wait. Can any adjustment be made to these few of the many ways people measure success wrongly? 

 We’ve been focused on the wrong thing namely ‘false success’ for so long. And have made some terribly awful judgments along the way—both personally and collectively.
            
Success is often wrongly associated with material wealth. And such is a false success and it is purely superficial. 

Tell me; is it any good to a man in gaining the world and at the end loses his health and soul?

           
Let me test you now with these following hypothetical scenarios involving “Elma and Kela”.

How do you actually measure success?

    Elma owns a business, a house and a family. He is honest, hard-working, and courteous. Elma’s business has flourished, and as a result, he and his family live comfortably ok.
  +++++++++++++++

Kela owns a similar business and also own a house of his own and a family too; and he makes far more money than Elma. In an effort to beat the competition, though, kela has become a workaholic and has numerous illnesses.

Who would you say is truly successful? 
 
Is it Kela? If you say the two, Elma and Kela were successful; you might be measuring success physically by results only, regardless of the means by which those results were achieved.
           
But on the contrary, if you chose Elma, you probably measure success by a person’s character traits and moral principle of work. 

Which is a good thing to do.
           
A person’s character traits include Contentment in circumstance. Often times, contentment remains elusive for both the rich and the poor. 

It is a struggle for humanity no matter their lot in life. Rich is the man or woman who can find contentment in either circumstance. 
          
Another character trait is Self-control. We are humans, people that too often give control of our most precious asset to another. 

We fall under the influence of substances, possessions, or entertainment. And when we do, our life is no longer our own. 

That is why those who retain self-control in the face of addiction ought to be recognized as unique and judged accordingly.
           
Now to help you measure success accurately, you need to understand that false success is based on image; true success is based on proper value. 

Elma (mentioned above), will enjoy sound health with his family and Elma’s children will be happy not because they have everything money can buy, but because they have a father who shows that he values spending time with them.


Related:

5 TIPS TO GET AND KEEP A JOB 

7 Tips to Build a Strong Work Ethic

HOW TO MAKE A HAPPY CAREER'S CHOICE IN YOUR 20s 

HOW TO RESPECT MONEY AND LIVE LONGER

DOES COMPETITION RUNS YOUR LIFE?

 

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